You and I shared something wonderful and I never want to forget that. I fell in love with you, but more than that, meeting you made me realize what true love really means. For the past two and a half years, I've been staring at every full moon and remembering everything we've been through together. I remember how talking to you that first day felt like coming home.
There's so much more, too. When I close my eyes, I see your face. When I walk, it's almost as if I can feel your hand in mine. Those things are real to me, but where they once brought me comfort, now they leave me with ache. I understood your reason for leaving, and I respected your decision. I still do, but we both know our relationship changed after that. We changed, and in your heart, I think you realized it, too. Maybe the time apart was too much, maybe it was just our different worlds. I don't know. Somehow, even though we still loved each other, we lost that magical bond that kept us together.
I'll understand if you never want to talk to me again, just as I'll understand if you hate me. Part of me hates me, too. Writing this forces me to acknowledge that, and when I look in the mirror, I know I'm looking at someone who isn't sure she deserves to be loved at all. I mean that.
Even though you may not want to hear it, I want you to know that you'll always be a part of me. In our time together, you claimed a special place in my heart, one I'll carry with me forever and that no one can ever replace. You're the first man I ever truly loved and no matter what the future brings, you will always be, and I know that my life is better for it.